My Life in a Nutshell

So....

I'm STILL waiting to get divorced. I signed a settlement agreement back in early November, and fully expected him to sign it. He did not...had six or seven changes to make to it, most of which were fine, but one of which I wanted to stay as-is (He had already agreed verbally to everything, and it was basically what his attorney had written in the first place.) He sent less $$ for December than he had been ordered to send and when I asked him for it, he flipped out (and I flipped right after him and we did the big blaming, shaming addict/co-addict dance) and now he says we will just go to court. (Okee-fine. Whatever.)

Also he is fighting my changing my name to Hafen. WHY!? You ask. (I know you asked because EVERYONE asks.) Because he can. Because Oklahoma law provides for me to change my name to a "previously used legal name," and I have never used Hafen legally. He could just sign the papers and the judge would OK it, but, because he CAN jerk me around about it, he is. So I'll have to do it here in TN once the divorce is final...or maybe before. I'll have to find out about that.

I HOPE to be heading out to CA in March (if the divorce is final and I have the $$) to a couple of massage schools. I can get in two months the 500 hours TN requires for licensing. I plan to practice as a massage therapist while going to college.

OK...now the eight kids: (the names have been changed to protect the innocent)

Evelyn is living in Memphis, going to college full time and working part time. She is majoring in Spanish and minoring in Photography. She works for an attorney doing title research. She is dating Jerry semi-seriously.

Oscar is living in Provo, Utah with his wife Tena. He works night-weekends at a residential treatment center for adolescents. He makes sure everyone is alive and behaving (read: sleeping) three times an hour. the rest of the time he spends playing computer games against his boss, or watching movies. Tena is in school to become a paramedic.

Kevin is also in Provo. He is working as a server in a Mexican restaurant, and has applied for the same shift at the same place Oscar is working. He plans to use his down time at work (if he's hired) studying to become an independent film maker.

Louise will be 18 this summer. She graduates highschool in the spring or summer (depending on how quickly she finishes her home school courses). She plans to attend a local community college in the fall. She is learning to play to piano, and doing very well. She is also developing her beautiful singing voice (piano teacher is helping there, too.) She recently bought a car, but does not yet have her license.

Dallas (12) is still a Lego maniac. He builds the most interesting and creative things. he will buy a whole set just to get a particular piece or two that he needs for a creation he is concocting in his head. he is studying harder in math since having confirmed that Lego only hires engineers as designers, and that engineers need to be fluent in math.

Ruby (9) is a budding artist. She loves to draw, paint and sculpt. She and her twin Wilbur (see below) enjoy soccer and play on the same team. She is very sweet-natured and quiet, but has a great sense of humor.

Wilbur (9) reads voraciously, excels in school (home school) and asks incredibly intelligent questions about all kinds of things--usually when we are in the car. His hair is almost as long as Ruby's. He started out three years ago growing it out to donate to Locks of Love (Louise and Ruby have both done that). But now that it is long enough, he doesn't know what he will look like with short hair, and doesn't want to cut it.

Carlson (4) is an absolute joy and a sore trial! He is very strong-willed and opinionated and I have spoiled him somewhat (ok, shamelessly). But he has a very sweet nature and a vivid imagination. He has vivid nightmares and recalls them totally on waking. (One recurring theme is his having to go to jail....) I received a dreamcatcher keychain in the mail several months ago (after sending $10 to the Lakota Sioux Children's fund)and it has just hung on the key hook in my kitchen. About a week ago he asked me what it was, and has been sleeping with it ever since.

The cat is black, male, still un neutered (shame on me) and makes a mad dash for the door every time it opens now that the weather has gotten colder(unless I notice him and say in a low, severe voice...."Ca-at! Don't you dare!" Then he just lays down and acts like he wasn't planning to go anywhere, let alone in the house. (Rental agreement says 'one outside cat' but we let him in last winter cuz he was a tiny baby and it was SOOO cold.)

So that's me.